my wife got me a lock-right for my 87 samurai in the mornings it seems to pop a lot back and forth side to side is this normal? is the gear lube to thick 79-90 seems very loud?

You might need to re-adjust it a bit tighter.  But some movement is to be expected as it is a full locker, the only way to get back to stock while still having a locker is to switch to the ARB.

took it all back out the shims there badly worn should of looked when i put it all in.   I used some other shims i had from a spare 3rd they looked brand new (out of a front 3rd less use) will test soon if all good front is next thinking about upgrading front shafts.  i run 32 11.50s  16v 6.5 will the stock shafts hold or should i upgrade?

It depends on how you drive it.  I wheeled for 4 years on stock birfields before I broke one, others can break them on a regular basis with 31" tires.  General rule is if you don't have a locker in the front end you should be ok.  Just make sure your tires are straight when backing up.